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How to Be Happy and Develop Self Esteem
In the SHM Community Forums, Lily tried to help someone who can't figure out how to be happy and talked about not having self esteem.
Lily responded:
To find happiness, I started focusing on what I needed for a change, rather than trying to make everyone else happy. I started to take better care of myself. I took all medication I WANTED to take exactly as prescribed, rather than just taking aswig from the bottles, or "getting arpound" to taking pills. I began measuring liquid medications and taking pills with meals, so I wouldn't forget them. I decided that I would do these things for a child, if I had one still at home, so I deserved the same love and care as any child.
I also began asking myself what i wanted. i know it's a little thing, but I never did it before. I just ran around, mindlessly doing what other people wanted. When i made a plan, or gave my word to someone, i made sure I kept it. Before I knew it, I felt better about myself.
But here are the three most helpful things that I did to find happiness that you might also find helpful:
1. Everyday, do at least 3 small things that will make you feel good about YOU. Whatever it is:
- painting your nails,
- making yourself an extra cup of tea,
- taking a walk,
- doing yoga for 10 minutes,
- taking a hot bath,
- calling an old friend, whatever.
- Come hereto SelfhelpMagazine for 10 minutes a day instead of watching one of those stupid TV shows you don't like anymore.
- Read their self-help materials.
- Hang out in their Meditation Department. It has lots of cool inspirational thoughts and relaxing videos.
- Write comments on their articles and start feeling like you belong to this healthy community of like-minded, generous people.
Three things, every day. Do it for you.
2. Think about getting yourself a therapist. There is nothing like an objective third party giving you weekly feedback about your situation and how to treat yourself more lovingly. They won't solve your problems, but rather, help you think more clearly about how to solve your own problems, and in the process, learn to make decisions that lead to betetr self-esteem and feeling good about yourself and your choices.
3. Keep posting in these forums. Find old messages that relate to self-esteem and read them and post to them. Spread yourself around and the more people see you, the more they will come to this first thread and respond to you. But if you don't talk to them, they won't be too motivated to come talk to you.
Around here, you get what you give. Give a lot and guess what…you'll get a whole lot! I found this website when I was a sad little puppy, and now I know where to come to get re-fueled.
Hope to see you around!
Lil