Embarrassment of Herpes and Approaching Women

Posted on 21. Dec, 2009 by SHM Staff in CLIPS FROM SHM DISCUSSION FORUMS, Health, Women

Dini responded to a concern of one SHM forum member, a lesbian who has herpes, about how to approach women. He said:

Welcome to these forums. You have a lot of things; your humanity and dignity and the courage and honesty to have come here and posted about your problem. Big thumbs up for that; I respect courage and honesty!!

I also saw your other post in another forum, much along the same lines. If you can stick around, tell us a bit more about yourself, you'll find that you'll get more responses to your thread. Also, if you poke around in other threads, perhaps those written by people who experience shyness, or have issues about sexually transmitted things, you might chime in; it's a good way to get people to know you and then they tend to respond to your thread more. That's been my experience.

Glad you're here!!

A suggestion? If you look for the "search" window and type in shyness, (or herpes, or lesbian relationships, or "when to tell people about _____ ," or "disclosure" you'll find LOTS of articles as well as threads here. Feel free to "revive" an old thread and bring it to the top if you relate to what the topic is and the discussion and if it helps you.

The "when to tell" thing can be tricky in my experience. We all, myself included, have personal issues and things which you wouldn't necessarily walk up to a total stranger and tell them about. They might not be the appropriate to tell somebody on the first "date" or whatever. But at some point, when and if you both feel that you want to pursue things, (whether that's a friendship or a "relationship") there comes a time to tell. INHO that's for two reasons; one to be honest with the other person and two because if you're like me, you want that person to know you. Over time, I've found that if I don't think too much about the "timing" of those things, the moment just seems to present itself. But it's the subject of a few threads around here too. I'd suggest roaming around a bit.

And let us know what you find and how you feel and what you think. OK? Don't just ask a question and disappear. Stick around; there are plenty of thoughtful, wise, compassionate folks around here, some of whom have walked in your shoes, and if you stick around with the kind of honesty you've shown "Have", you'll get the benefit of it. But also try to chime in elsewhere if you feel your experience might help someone else out; it's sort of a the more you give the more you receive thing around here.

I'd be curious what you find about shyness or anything else around the site, and how you feel about it. I know you'll find some good stuff (LOL….cuz I just cheated and looked myself).

Take care, and talk to you soon.

And welcome.

Share and Enjoy: