SelfhelpMagazine

by Patricia Pitta, Ph.D., A.B.P.P.

You show some insight that it is both of you have responsibility for the lack of sexual intimacy in your relationship. The realities you present are real, but you need to make time for sexual pleasure if you want to have it as part of your relationship.

Just as you make a schedule for driving the kids and getting your work accomplished, you need to make a schedule for special time together.

Many times, couples lose sexual intimacy because they are covertly or overtly angry with each other. You and your wife might want to ask yourselves if this applies. If so, talk out what is making both of you angry.

As the anger lifts, time for sex will may become available. A relationship with little or no sex, eventually becomes a land mind full of anger and aggression which can be taken out on each other destructively. May I suggest that you read They Laughed When I Said That Good Sex Is Very Good For You by Anthony Fiore, Ph.D. Another good area to examine for questions about sexuality is the SelfhelpMagazine.com Sexuality Department.

If these suggestions don't help, you may want to consider seeking a professional who specializes in relationships or sex therapy. Check your local phone book for names and numbers, or check your State Psychological Association for numbers: http://locator.apa.org.

About the Author:

Dr. Patricia Pitta is a clinical psychologist practicing in Manhasset, New York, for more than 20 years. She is a Diplomat in Family Psychology of the American Psychological Association and an Approved Supervisor of the American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy. Dr. Pitta is also the President of the Long Island Association of Marriage and Family Therapy.

She has created a treatment modality that enables the partners to accept responsibility for their parts in relationship problems leading to resolution of issues without getting stuck in blame. She encourages self growth which enhances couple growth and family development.