Self-help Articles

by Edward A. Dreyfus, Ph.D.

You believe that you have to choose between an honest comfortable relationship, on the one hand, and a stimulating, exciting relationship with someone who broke your heart. You believe that at 22 you should be ready to settle down and not be so picky.

Twenty-two years of age is not the end of the line and these two relationships are not the only choices available to you. Often people believe that they have to choose between comfort and excitement in relationships as if they cannot co-exist.

If they choose comfort, they often regret not having had the excitement and wonder what their life would have been like had they made the other choice. If they choose excitement, the thrill often fades and they wish they had made the other choice.

You will find that you can have comfort, honesty, intellectual stimulation, and physical chemistry all in the same package. It just may take bit more patience. Your life is just beginning to unfold.

Perhaps you are not being picky, but discriminating, not willing to settle for less than what you want. In a few years you may find that you have even more requirements for a prospective mate. Keep asking relationship questions until you feel confident in your choices.

About the Author:

Dr. Edward A. Dreyfus is a Clinical Psychologist, Marriage, Family, Child Therapist, and Sex Therapist. Dr. Dreyfus has been providing psychological services in the Los Angeles-Santa Monica area for over 30 years. He offers individual psychotherapy to adolescents and adults, divorce mediation, couples counseling, group therapy, and career and vocational counseling and assessment. Dr. Dreyfus can be reached at: (310) 208-5700.