Self-help Articles

by Lane Fabby, MS

Do you want your life to be in balance? Do you want to be happy? In order to deal with the ups and downs of life, you may want to consider the need for mental balance in you pursuit of happiness.

How do you achieve happiness? By taking it one day at a time; and when the going gets rough, one hour or one minute at a time. How do you fill those minutes, hours, and days? Many successful and content people have learned to fill them with positive thoughts, speech, actions and vision. Happiness is within reach, even for the many who struggle with all too real and painful lives. Here's more detail on how to achieve it:

The more out of control your life seems, the more you want to begin by considering the things that are in your control:

1. You control your own thoughts (i.e. state of mind).
2. You control your own words (i.e. communication).
3. You control your own actions (i.e. execution).

First, many great philosophers and psychologists have written about how much of our well-being and attitude can shape how we feel. For example, you can wake up in the morning and think, "My spouse is gone, I am alone with the kids, and I have to do everything (as usual)." Or, you can wake up grateful and think, "My spouse is making a living in our wonderful country, I get to spend quality time with my kids, and I look forward to taking care of things that need to get done."

Even when you are at the lowest point in your life and negative thoughts have taken over, you have the power to control them. It is your choice to discard them, ignore them, or act upon them. You can overcome difficulties life may bring and may want to consider changing your thoughts, because it could change your world. Choosing the right state of mind (i.e. finding the positive in a situation, no matter how dismal) can truly be life-changing – and that search is the key to happiness.

Second, it is a good idea to think before you speak. Words are a powerful source of lasting impressions, and thinking before speaking can help prevent false interpretations. You should choose your words wisely to avoid saying something you didn't mean.

Another significant part of communicating is listening. You should stop pretending to listen when, truthfully, you hear nothing because you are formulating a response in your head of what to say next. Instead, you may want to work on listening to understand and respect the other person. Communication can align, build connection, or the opposite (if you let it), and is one of the keys to creating mental balance in your life.

Third, executing a plan has great reward associated with it. Don't you feel good after things get done that you needed to accomplish? This is because you are proud of yourself for taking care of something that required an end result. If you choose to procrastinate, be lazy, or spend time complaining of things that need to get done, then you, alone, are responsible for nothing getting accomplished.

It is important to understand that you can make the decision to be productive, and do it – it's that simple, and that challenging. Make a list if that helps, do things on the list, and check off that list as you go. Execution leads to self-satisfaction and is another key to creating mental balance in your life.

The bottom line is that you are the boss of you. If you want to improve your life, you may want to consider choosing to exude the right thoughts, words, and actions in order to possess mental balance and happiness.

If you are able to do this, then your future will be brighter and you will be a much happier person as well as appreciate the rewards associated with responsibility. Life is full of obstacles, but these obstacles are more easily overcome by how you approach them and deal with them. Why not enjoy life to the fullest and have power to shape even small parts of your future? It is mostly up to YOU!

Reference:

Peale, V. Norman (1996). "The Power of Positive Thinking". New York: Random House, Inc.

About the Author:

Lane Fabby, MS works virtually for a consulting firm, Frew & Associates, that provides executive education services to the private and public sectors. She is a graduate from the University of San Diego's School of Business Administration with a Master of Science degree in Global Leadership and currently resides in Leonardtown, Maryland, with her husband, Rick, and their three children.