Self-help Articles

by Raymond Novaco, Ph.D.

New research is uncovering more helpful information about anger management all the time. This article will help you learn a few things you probably don't already know about what really works. Let's start by defining our term. Anger management means learning how to not get angry so often, how to keep it at low levels of intensity, and how to prevent it from lasting too long.

Having a short fuse -- reacting very quickly to too many things—has few pay-offs. Anger that lasts too long is heavy baggage that drains your energy. Anger management keeps you from being the victim of your own anger. When it happens that an anger response is justified, you can then feel more comfortable with being angry because you understand it and know what to do with it.

Anger management involves taking action that is aimed at resolving a problem. It involves learning how to be task-oriented. This means facing problems squarely but without hostility. Confrontation can be constructive, but this requires not taking things personally, sticking to the issues, and knowing how to say things. Hostility cuts, picks-at, shoves, and kicks. Constructive confrontation involves good judgment, diplomacy, and firmness. Self-awareness, self-regulation, and coping skills are the keys.

Anger is often misused as a way to solve problems. Some people seem to think that if they shout loud enough, then other people will do what they want. Anger is an easy way to assert one’s will, trying to take charge of a situation. This might produce compliance, but it does not produce real cooperation or problem-solving. And getting demonstrably angry rarely sets a good example of how to address a problem or obstacle. Dealing effectively with difficult situations requires composure. The more complex or consequential the problem is, the more composure is needed. Even in the face of a physical threat to your survival or those whom you love, anger must be regulated to respond with maximum effectiveness.

Anger control or anger management does not mean bottling up anger with a tight lid; it does not mean making believe nothing is bothering you; nor does it mean being anybody's patsy or punching bag. What it does mean is several important things:

* Recognizing the costs of getting angry

* Keeping anger at moderate levels of intensity when it does occur

* Expressing anger constructively, especially when directed at other people

* Using effective problem-solving strategies to change problem situations

You can be composed, direct, and firm without your anger being out of control. This will enable you to be better at dealing with situations that cause or provoke anger. Having the ability to control your anger means that you will be more effective at anger management.

About the Author

Raymond W. Novaco, Ph.D., pioneered cognitive-behavioral therapy for anger, coining the term “anger management”, and demonstrated the effectiveness of his treatment approach in empirically-based clinical research. He received the Best Contribution Award from the International Society for Research on Aggression (1978), the Distinguished Contributions to Psychology Award from the California Psychological Association (2000), and the Academic Award from the Division of Forensic Psychology of the British Psychological Society (2009). Dr. Novaco is a professor of psychology in the Department of Psychology and Social Behavior, University of California, Irvine.